Goodbye

Almost Lover...

Well he wasn't my "almost" lover but my husband....

This song is something I literally listened to for months during and after the divorce.

It played on my play list this morning and describes every emotion from that experience.

I remember standing there one night as he gave me a "final" hug knowing that it was over.. even though we both said we were going to work it out.

Then we both just gave up.

I felt betrayed.. left there to stand alone. FOREVER

Some days I still feel that way, its slowly getting better.

The part of this song that always hits me is when she is talking about how she can't seem to move on but that the almost lover is doing just fine.

Why is it that I have had to struggle spiritually, financially, emotionally, etc. While he was doing just fine and getting ready to be re-married.

Some days I just want to turn back time and do EVERYTHING possible to save that marriage.

Then I remember.

The lord sometimes lets good things fall apart and better ones to come into place.

One day I will love again, more deep, more pure, and better than ever.

One day I will trust fully again,

And one day I will have that eternal marriage and eternal family that is so important to me no matter how far out of reach it seems to be at this present moment.

Sorry for the "downer" post... I will post some more positive songs from here on out.